Awaiting Your Positive Response: Fabbaloo’s Mailbag Opens

After an absence of many months, our intermittent inspection of our mailbag returns with several astounding and highly amusing enquiries.

You would be amazed at the amount of incoming email this publication receives. Not only do we receive press releases and announcements from countless 3D printing organizations, but also for unrelated industries. Often people mistakenly contact us for 3D print supplies or equipment, and that’s understandable.

But sometimes the messages are too astoundingly ridiculous to ignore, and I’ve prepared a selection of them for your enjoyment. I’ve also included my responses, had I actually bothered to do so.

Remember: all of these are actual, true messages we have received and shown to you via cut and paste. Spelling, grammar and other errors remain as we received them. Only the personal details have been removed to protect the innocent. [Editor: But are they really innocent?]

Positive Response

Hello Sir/Mam,

I want to post on this site:  https://www.fabbaloo.com/

How much Do You Charge Me ?

Can You tell me the casino And gambling price ?

I am waiting your positive response

Things were going pretty well until I saw your request for “casino And gambling price”. Then I changed my mind. Correction: it was already changed.

Save As

Been using your software for a monoprice mini 3D resin printer and the printer uses GIF files. Is there a way to save as a GIF in your software?

Aside from the fact that we don’t offer software, I am really puzzled how your 3D printer uses GIF files. Perhaps you have figured out a magic way to push 2D files into 3D printers? Tell us more!

PETG Order

Can you please quote us for 1000 kg & 5000 kg PETG filament? Thanks.

Let’s see, a typical 3D printer can print a complex object at about 0.2g per minute. This means your large print will take about 17 days to complete. What are you printing that is so big??? Will it be pink?

29% Cheaper

Message: Hello

I have a question, i see a lot of products on this site, I have made a screenshot of some products, [SUSPICIOUS URL REDACTED] that you also sell in your store. But there products are 29% cheaper, well my question is what is the difference between your product, is it the quality or something else, I hope you can answer my question.

This is quite interesting, I had no idea there were other stores selling our products at 29% cheaper prices. However, I am bit fussed at describing how our quality justifies the price difference because WE DON’T SELL ANY PRODUCTS!

Natal Chart

Email: sales@[REDACTED]
Message: Dear Madam, Dear Sir In case of your interest, we can create an absolutely accurate and highly detailed Natal Chart, Compatibility Of Partners, and One-Year Forecasts of Events reports for you and your loved ones for the lowest prices on the market. Please visit our site [REDACTED] for more information. We will be delighted to hear from you. Have a great day.

Ooo! Forecasts are something we frequently publish, typically at the beginning of the year. Do you think this would work for an Ultimaker? I’m interested to know how mine will make out this year, and particularly whether it is compatible with some sketchy filament someone sent me.

Mexico Opportunity!

Message: I promote a Land. In an excellent investment point, near Torreón Coahuila “México”.
Excellent opportunity. Private Property, Free of Encumbrance.
It is a large area, located in the state of Coahuila, Mexico.
Therefore, the concern to propose this excellent place to opinions and proposals for projects that they have in mind.
VISIT US.

This location is pretty close to Sinaloa, and after I watched the latest season of Narcos I am having second thoughts about the purchase. Would you have anything closer to the beach?

BIG DIY

Name: [REDACTED]
Email: [REDACTED]@gmail.com
Message: Big DIY 3D Printer MKII

<end of message>

It’s big, Really, Really BIG! And it’s a MKII. But what is it?

Photos 10% Off

Hi,

I would like to know if you have pictures and or videos of high resolution 3D prints.

Also, on your website you advertise a 10% discount if we subscribe to your newsletter, but once we submit our email, we never get the discount code.

I believe I know the reason you did not receive a discount code: WE HAVE NEVER SENT ONE BECAUSE WE DON’T SELL PHOTOS AND HAVE NO DISCOUNTS!

PLEASE TELL ME

  Hi dear
What Is Post Price On This Sites www.fabbaloo.com/
Please Tell Me The General Post Price
Please Tell Me The Casino Post Price
Can Accept Casino Links???
Post On The Home Page??

post will be indexed in 24 hours?

I Am Waiting For Your Friendly Response

I Am Waiting For You To Stop Sending Me Messages.

Spelling

Email: [REDACTED]@gmail.com
Message: It looks like you’ve misspelled the word “Toure” on your website. I thought you would like to know :). Silly mistakes can ruin your site’s credibility. I’ve used a tool called [REDACTED] in the past to keep mistakes off of my website.

Aha, you are correct! We might have missed the accent on “Nora Touré”, one of our frequent contributing authors. On the other hand, maybe your spell checking system can’t distinguish a name from a word?

Introductions!

Hope you are fine today! My name is [REDACTED] and I contact you to offer cooperation which I hope will be interesting for you. I introduce major company which nite top-tier dating businesses worldwide.

I was not aware that companies could date each other, this is tremendous news! Tell me, which company do you think best matches us? I have to tell you we have certain unusual preferences that should probably match with the other party before things get too intense.

Story Ideas

My name is [REDACTED], and I write for [REDACTED] Gas Systems. I wanted to talk to you about contributing an article to your website to freshen up your content!

I’ve been working on a couple different articles that I think your audience would find enlightening. I’m curious to know which one you think might be a better fit:

Beer and Nitrogen—How Are These Two Related? or What Is Nitro Beer and Why Is It Becoming So Popular?

Nitrogen beer and 3D printing — how are these two related? THEY ARE NOT.

100% Ethical

Hi there,

Want more traffic on your web shop; and orders?

Let me know, we have ethical and 100% effective solution.

Looking forward hearing from you!

Oh my goodness! Thankfully you have offered an ethical solution, I would never have considered an unethical solution. You are ethical, right? Right???

Good Time!

Name: [REDACTED]
Email: [REDACTED]@gmail.com
Message: hello. Good time. I wanted a 3D metal printer. How can I have a 3D metal printer? How much do these devices cost? Do you have a catalogue of these devices

Good time, indeed! Metal printers can definitely make times good for everyone, if you have the wallet to pay for them. Do you?

Large Offer

I am [REDACTED], and I’m and I write you on behalf of a large international establishment. We would like to offer you cooperation.
Could you please read the offer: [SUSPICIOUS URL REDACTED]
If you are interested in it, please contact us.

I’m so impressed that I have been contacted by you, “on behalf of a large international establishment”. If only we knew which establishment this was, we might pursue this further.

REVERT BACK

Dear Concerned,

We want to serve programmatic ads on your Website .Kindly revert Back.

We shall not revert. That would be too Neanderthal! Also, why are we concerned?

No Interest

Hi,

Is my offer below of any interest to you?

Kind regards,

<nothing below>

No. Maybe you should actually tell us the offer?

Wait Many Kinds

Our company is a manufacturer that processes all kinds of Chinese medicinal materials. Among the same products in the market, the price is low and the quality is good.
our products:
1¡¢Allyl hexanoate Natural
2¡¢Melonal
3¡¢L-menthyl lactate Natural
4¡¢Neotame
5¡¢Vanillin Natural
6¡¢Watermelon ketone
7¡¢Raspberry ketone Natural
Wait many kinds

I’m not sure these are what we need. Do you have Pepsi? You do have MANY KINDS.

Keeping It Secure

Subject: SECURITY WEEKNESS!

Hello,
I’m [REDACTED], White Hat Hacker

I have something to report about security weakness 🙂

I’m rather insulted you believe we have a weekness. We have no such thing, Mr. Hacker.

Very Popular

Hi There!

I’m here to submit a guest post to your website fabbaloo.com  .  This post or article will be highly related to the post that is particularly popular with your readers.

Here are the articles that I’m excited to submit:

How To Start A Fishing Business

Finally, someone who ACTUALLY KNOWS our readers! My goodness, we would NEVER have considered a story about fishing would be HIGHLY RELATED to our business!