A Jolly Trip Through the Fabbaloo Mailbag

Time to check our mailbag again. [Source: Pixabay]

It’s that time once again to review the unusual, erratic and confusing messages received at our office.

As a major 3D print publication we constantly receive notices from external parties. There’s often comments on our stories, press releases from vendors, enquiries from readers, and much more.

While by far the majority of our incoming correspondence is sensible, appropriate and clear, there are sometimes messages of a curious nature that we really don’t know what to do with.

Well, we do know. We’re publishing anonymously the most intriguing messages here and providing a reply.

Let’s dig in. As a reminder, these are all actual messages sent by (apparently) actual people to us. Only the names and other identifying information has been removed to protect the innocent(?)

Hello,

Please let me know the price for ABS Plastic Filament, 1.75 mm Diameter, 1.54 lbs Spool

I’m afraid we don’t sell filament. We write about filament. We don’t sell it. And who sells 1.54 pound spools?

Hi!

I would like to know if you sell PLA or ABS cartridges for 3D printer CUBE 3rd generation.

Really? You’re still using a CUBE 3D printer, that which was not only withdrawn from sale in 2015, three years ago, but the entire division of 3D Systems that sold it went at the same time? The same machine that’s been functionally and financially overtaken by countless other 3D printing options since then? I strongly suggest you upgrade to a current machine for which you can actually buy filament easily and cheaply.

Hello,

I beg you to give me the EMERGENCY contact of a commercial export,

I know it’s an EMERGENCY, but we don’t have a commercial export. I’m not even sure whether a commercial export can respond. It may depend on its packaging, I suppose.

Greeting

[MYSTERIOUS SLAVIC COMPANY NAME REDACTED] pleasure innovation with ur product

We perfer the best offer 3D printer

happy co-op between us

I perfer pleasure co-op with you too!

拝臻啓

貴社ますま朋すご盛栄震のこ洋ととお慶妮び申し上げます。

会社影は腰占プ淹反ラスチック生産に力躇を入れており矫藕、ぜひ業務関讶係酗を築诬き禹たいと思っ盂ており寝ます许。

詳細は贸ぜひ辐ご連絡くだ怪さ溜い郑。

以茫篇上须、よ阳ろし掐くお願い善いたします。

　　I’m afraid I can’t read this. Let’s do a quick translate:

Worshipers

I would like to express my gratitude to you for your success in the upcoming earthquake.

The company shadow puts a strong emphasis on the production of the lapeless brewing rustic, so I’d like to build a business relationship and I want to sleep and I sleep.

Please contact me for details for details.

Position Hisashi Ue squirrel, I will do my best.

Aha. That makes things MUCH CLEARER!

I want to sleep, too. With my lapeless brewing rustic.

Hi

Am Mr [REDACTED].I would like to place an order of (Motohome Cleaner)from your company to Haiti,kindly email me with the types you have and their prices and also ,your term of payment.Waiting for your prompt responses.

I think I’d like to make sure your Motohome is clean, too. But I’m afraid we have no cleaners here.

Hi!

I would like to know if you sell PLA or ABS cartridges for 3D printer CUBE 3rd generation.

Wait, you’re STILL using the CUBE? Please upgrade your equipment!!!

Dear Sir,

Please find attached RFQ with drawings for your perusal. Please kindly assist with quote.

All documentation relating to this RFQ can be downloaded as attached file and is password protected due to confidentiality. Password is 1278. Please keep confidential.

Oh yes, I will most certainly keep this confidential. I will not even send the password to the documentation file in unencrypted emails.

Attached is our formal RFQ, We received a request which is currently outside of our current capability. I have attached the 3D CAD data for your reference.

Could you provide a recommendation along with a quote?

No, this is outside of our current capability.

URGENT ENQUIRY!

Dear Sirs,

Kindly mail us your techno commercial offer for the following:

SLA 3D PRINTER ( Detailed specifications as per Attached sheet. )

Would this work?

Dear Sirs

We will be in Moscow and Saint Petersburg from [DATES REDACTED] and during this period highly interested to have meetings with Russian companies involved in 3D industry .

Thanks and Regards

We will let Vladimir know.

Dear manager,

Our company specializes in producing new blue helmets global export business

Headquartered in Guangzhou, China.

Please send inquiry, we will give you the best price.

Of course, we need MANY new blue helmets! All of our staff wear them every work day to protect against BAD THINGS that may happen. You can never have enough BLUE HELMETS!

I’m sorry to bother you, our company is a professional manufacturer of PC lamp shade profiles, if your company needs, please contact me.

No.

Dear Sir,

Hello.

I am pleased to see you on the Internet to understand us, therefore, we hope to take the opportunity to establish business relationship with your company. We are [NAME REDACTED] Co., Ltd. Our company mainly engaged in food machinery. Products include: almonds opening machine, circular table pushing saws, dumpling machine, dumpling machine, skinning machine, steamed buns and so on. Our almond opener is safe and the shield is designed in the same direction of rotation. The open face is flat. Power is driven by a low-power motor, saving energy. Safe, reliable and technologically advanced. No need to be a professional master. Convenient, is your ideal device to get rich.

If you want to know more about our products, please contact me.

Thank you first!

Best wishes

Thank you second!

Hello!

While it is not our speciality, your note makes me hungry for dumplings and dumplings! However, since only your almond opener is safe, we can’t take on either dumpling machine.

Hi,

This is [NAME REDACTED] from [COMPANY NAME] socks.

We are the socks’ supplier,and we have designed some new productions.

Have a look.

Would love to look if you sent us a picture. Or a link. Or anything.

Unfortunately, during our first evaluation we have not been able to find all the information needed. Your technology, being the pioneer in 3D metal printing following the principles of [WELL KNOWN 3D PRINTING PROCESS NAME REDACTED], it would be of great help if you could please help by answering a few questions.

When did the first evaluation happen, exactly? We didn’t feel anything.

Hello,

I would like to make an inquiry regarding Heat Gun. Email me available sizes/models or website for available ones. Also want to know what payment you accept. Hope to hear back from you soon.

We accept cash. Only cash. In small bills.

All guys are freaks!

Are you different? I am a delightful tootsie who wants to receive sweet kisses and hugs every day.

You can admire my pics and videos following the link.

Hi tootsie! Really looking forward to sweet kisses and hugs every day! But not from you.

Please confirm your Unsubcsriibe

To confirm your Unsubcsriibe, please click here or on the link below.

Unsubcsribe me!

Thank you!

But I really, really, really want to Unsubcsriiiiibbbbeeee!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Hello The Mail User,

Have a good day.

Learn that you are special in 3d printer controller board,we are a printed circuit boards Manufacturer,also have our own PCB Assembly factory,do you have a few minutes to connect and see if this is something that may be of value to you?

Hello The Confusing Requestor, We have no 3d printer controller board here, apologies.

Good Day,

My name is [NAME REDACTED] and Can you please quote me on printing 80,000 copies of Flyers with the following specs.

A. Measures 8.5′ x 11′

B. 80# Gloss Text

C. 0.25 – White border

D. Full color

E. It Should be Flat

F. One Side printing

G. Do you accept credit card payment.

Please provide quote on 80,000 copies.Kindly quote accordingly for me to supply art-work.Awaiting for your prompt reply.

Kindly suggest you ask an actual paper printshop, maybe one located in your area instead of sending maybe billions of emails to anyone mentioning the word “printing”. Oops, mentioned it again!

require pro-type mobility scooter, would be 2 seaters other pull out seat at the back of the scooter – leg room, folding side basket – dog carrier, folding scooter battery operated, safety light and mirrior, cover.

Aha! We can actually do this – except for the mirrior. Not sure what that is, sorry!

Hi my dear I want to know if u are selling CAZZA X1 core printer?

Hahahahahahahahahahaha

I design hoodies and I’m looking to get some flexible ma
terial for the clothing. How much does it usually cost. Who do I talk to?

Not Us.

Hello! Fabbaloo appreciate knowing if your company  can  mount 2 maunaul wheel chair together,  with legs room’s, add side wide basket, 6 bottoms wheels with grid for trackson, install weir view mirror. One wheelchair at the back, that can pull out. Push up door, back battery.

possible   circle  seating at the front, the wheelchair should be able to fit a person arount 350 to 495 1b.

compact easy to fold.

  Best Regard [ENGLISH-SOUNDING NAME REDACTED]

I am trying to visualize this, and it gets more interesting each time I do so. You want a six-wheel, caterpillar tracked, dual-swivel-seating, battery-powered foldable wheelchair with rear-deployable mobile wheelchair? Able to fit a 495 pound person? Let me check and see if we have this.

No.

Hi!

I would like to know if you sell PLA or ABS cartridges for 3D printer CUBE 3rd generation.

Stop it! Stop it right now!